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Today's deal comes from Wednesday's league match. Because I am answerable to no-one and nothing other than my conscience, I will get my excuses in first:

- I had a bad cold
- I'd had a long day at work
- I was worried about my pension fund
- My fantasy football team required attention

Oh alright, maybe I did play like a slightly small plank, but why did it have to be under the eagle-eyed gaze of His Royal Majestic Personage (HRMP)?
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